The Conscious Awareness Experience Day 4

I’ve been very aware of my actions. Of each action, I’ve been observant of my thoughts. What I realized today, was I have been on auto – pilot when it come to decision making.

This is something I never really considered, which shows how automatic and engraved in my mind it was. I’ve been completely unaware of the decisions I make. I seem to just make them.

Even during the this conscious awareness experience, I’ve been very aware of my actions and my thoughts, but have not been at all aware of my choices, and decision.

It’s a very fine line, in some instances I’ve been conscious of how I would react emotionally and physically to a situation, but at the same time reacting through the decisions I make, completely unaware.

I was aware of grabbing hold of the beer bottle, putting it to my lips and the delicious taste on each of my millions of taste buds. At the same time, unaware of when I made the decision to drink that beer.

So, what’s coming up for me here is being aware of my decision making process. This the root from which all our actions are driven. Such a simple thing, which I have been exposed to over and over through personal development, yet until I started being aware of myself, didn’t realize.

Response-Ability, is what it comes down to. Through the Discovery Series and teachings from Osho, I’ve come to realize the true meaning of this word, it’s my ability to respond to a given situation. What I was unaware of, is that everything in life is a situation. I was under the impression that a situation had to be something negative, some sort of obstacle or barrier. But, every experience in which requires a decision or response is a situation, from the decision to brush your teeth, to becoming a millionaire to taking an intrinsic look within yourself.

The response to any situation, creates a new situation, each and every time. So in every moment, with every decision we make, mentally, physically and spiritual, we arrive only at the next situation then we must respond once again to this situation. And this is how we co-create our lives.

With this, it may serve us all to be aware of not only our response to a situation, but what situation may arrive next, because of this response. Keep in mind, we are not 100% in control of the next situation, thus we are co-creators of our lives. There is a energy force, much larger and much more powerful, that we may never fully understand.

The Conscious Awareness Experiment Day 2

The gaps between thoughts is where awareness lives. Thoughts need space, awareness is in the present, there is no space. Therefore there can be no thoughts. Being aware in every moment, not an easy task, but with disciple and practice can be attained. Awareness is a seed, nuture it and it will grow into a tree.

With awareness actions are performed more accurately, because you are co-creating each the results of each action. A cook create wonderful tasting food, because he is aware of each ingredience he is using. It is the quality of his awareness that make the wonderful taste.

Those who are world class in what they do, are so because of the awareness they bring to what they do. When you bring awareness to each and every task you do, to each and every action you take, you are co-creating the result by simply being aware of what you are doing, you are giving each action the energy attention and focus, think about how the law of attraction works. That which you give you energy, attention and focus to, expands.

I relized this in the little things I did throughout the day. Making tea, which I do every morning. I was aware of putting the honey it, and with that awareness I knew it would be perfect. I must say, in all the years I’ve been making tea on a daily basis, today I made the best Tea i’ve ever tasted. Before when I used to make my tea, I would be running back and forth, making tea and journaling. So my thoughts would be shooting at 1,000 miles per hour, the honey would just be thrown in there. Some days good, some day’s ok, some day’s off. But, today I realize how to make the perfect tea every-time.

I realized the things I did mechanically, being unaware, being consumed by thoughts while performing action, was when I made mistakes. Not every time, but I caught my self many times, and I realize, I was thinking and taking action at the same time, I was not aware, thus I made a mistake.

Investigating and experiencing awareness is starting to clear up so much for me. I’ve come to realize why I’ve gotten the results I have in my life, and it simply comes down to awareness. Thinking and acting at the same time is worst type of multi-tasking, thinking and acting should have their own dedicated times. I realized all my life, my awareness has always been split. I’m a thinker, thoughts constantly bombarded my mind, shooting at thousands of miles per hour.

I’m a very passionate person, when I get into something I put my whole mind into it, and that’s where the problems lays. My mind is going off, thinking and speaking while I’m taking action, so I’m not completely aware of what I’m doing, I’m not fully focused, I’m occupied with my thoughts. While I mechanically take actions, unaware.

So, I’m creating half-assed results, because I have half-assed attention and focus.

The other thing here is, with so many thoughts flowing all the time, many times I don’t take a moment to acknowledge the results, I’m to engrossed in what else I can do, what I’m going to do next, and completely overlook the results.

You can have a bag of diamonds, but if you do not have the eyes to see them, you may toss them aside thinking they’re are simple pieces of glass! Awareness is the only way to truly know what we have.

You may make the best tasting tea in the world, but if you are reading a book as you sip on your tea, you’ll never know that you make the best tasting tea in the world. It’s amazing how much I learned from a cup of tea today.

The Conscious Awareness Project Day 1

This first hour of awareness is feeling very uncomfortable. I feel the turbulance inside of me. As I keep focused on staying aware of exactly what I am doing in each moment, my mind wants to throw up and lash out everything inside it…it wants to scream and shout, it feels very uncomfortable because it is not in control.

I can physically feel it in my solarplexus as a weight. This uncomfortablity maybe be because the first thing I do every morning after waking up is let my mind free, that is the time when it it is most active, goes off about everything good and bad.

But now I have shifted my awareness to that which Im doing in the very moment. My mind will have it’s chance to let loose and pour out everything, but only when it is time to do so and I can be completely aware of that as well, this way I can be aware of what’s going on in my mind, what thoughts I’m having.

—– Side-note —–

It’s a funny thing, just a little while ago while i was in the shower, I kept my awareness on what I was doing, not letting my mind stray and go bananas with all it’s thoughts It wanted to lash out very badly, it go very uncomfortable. But, now that I am allowing it to speak, with awareness and observation, it doesn’t have much to say.

—– Side-note —–

The thing I find though, is when you think with awareness, impure thoughts are not possible. I learned this from journaling, while I’m journaling I hardly ever have thoughts which are not in alignment with me.

Awareness gets rid of all the crap, the more aware you are the more real you are.

When you do things with awareness, you do things right! I realized this right now pouring my cup of tea. I usaully end up spilling a lot of it as I pour from pot to cup then cup to cup to cool it…i did it with awareness and didn’t spill any!

With awareness I feel no need to do anything. But to reside in my awareness. I feel no need to do my personal development, for all it will do is try to teach me how to be aware. But can you be taught how to be aware? Where is the teaching in that. Just be aware.

With awareness the only urge I have is to share that which is coming form within me with the world. I have no more desires, no more dreams. Just to be here in this moment, in every moment with an awareness and allow the Universal Energy to flow through me, and then share that energy with the world. All else is nonsense, I don’t care for it.

Now, how can I go in the direction of my dreams? I no longer have any! I have become dispassionate..lol. No more passion resides within me and I love it! Because now all I can do is LOVE! AWARENESS!

Silent Service is The Key

Silence is the key! Be silent, always be silent. Turn off the Monkey Chatter. Be silent (……………………………………………………………………). When your silent, what comes to you is intutions and that is God speaking to you. You can only hear him through silence. If you want to talk to someone across the world, you need a phone to do so. Like a phone, silence is the instrument that gives you a direct connection to God.

Don’t just listen to him, let him control you. Surrender! Get silent and just let it happen, let “life” happen, let the “world” happen. Go wherever he takes you, have no judgements about it, just SHUT UP and Watch!

Let him flow through you, let him use you to do whatsoever he pleases. The amazing thing is, though it sounds like you’ve become a zombie, a robot, controlled by this force, you’ll have the ultimate human being than ever. You’ll be more alive than ever before.

When you serve the Universe, you are shown the reality of it. You no longer take cues from your ego fabricated mind of limited view points and worrying about the consequences of your action, but you take cues from the unlimited Universe that works in perfection, every consequence is the right consequence.

Serve the Universe and it will serve you. It will fill your life with all that you desire, this is the natural law by which the Universe operates. You scratch his back, and he’ll scratch yours. But, don’t fall into the trap of “trying” to serve the Universe for your benefit. It will not work then, because then all your doing is serving your Ego. As we all know ego does not reciprocate your actions, the more you give it the more it wants. (………………………………………) Silence is the Key!

Wake Up

There is only one truth and that is the higher power. Everything else is false, nothing really exists, it’s all just a dream. Dreams we make up and feed into, so may times these lives turn into nightmares, because we’re not aware of the fact that it’s all just a movie and nothing is real.

WAKE UP!

When you wake up form this “nightmare” and see this life for what it really is, a dream! You’ll realize you can make whatever you want of “life.” Living a ego based life we try to acquire things form the outside world, believing these things will make you happier or more comfortable. But, everything you need for happiness and comfort is right inside of you. THUS, the conflict and uneasiness on the inside is independent of the material world.

We spend our lives trying to fix things in our outside world. That’s not our resposibilty, that’s the Universe resposibilty. Your only resposibility is to fix your inside world and be the best person you can possibly be and all else will simply fall into place.